On The Day

To prepare for the role of Mother of the Bride or Groom, choose a comfortable, stylish outfit that complements the wedding's colour scheme and your personal style, coordinating with the other Mother of the Bride or Groom. Get your hair and makeup done, and consider treatments like brow lamination in advance. On the day, focus on support and organization by having a to-do list and dressing last, allowing time to help the bride and field questions. 

Wedding Planning

Check in regularly with your daughter. Maintain an open line of communication to discuss her vision and expectations for the wedding. Ask questions about the details she's picturing, but always listen to her dreams for the day.

Offer assistance, but wait to be asked. Your daughter may appreciate help with tasks like managing the guest list, coordinating with vendors, or shopping for her wedding dress. However, follow her lead to avoid overstepping. If she prefers to keep some things private, don't take it personally.

Discuss any traditions beforehand. If you're interested in including certain family customs, talk with the couple early in the process. Some modern couples are choosing to forgo older traditions, so it's important to have a conversation and get on the same page.

Be a calm presence. Wedding planning can be stressful, and emotions can run high. Your role is to be a source of calm and positivity. If disagreements arise, address them calmly and respectfully, not in the middle of a wedding event.

Set boundaries. While it is a big day for you, it is ultimately the couple's celebration. Respect their choices, even if they aren't what you would have done.

Choosing your attire

Consult the couple first. Before you go shopping, discuss the wedding's formality, color scheme, and venue with the bride. Your outfit should complement—not match—the bridal party and suit the overall aesthetic.

Coordinate with the mother of the groom. Once you have an idea of what you'll be wearing, reach out to the mother of the groom. The two of you don't need to match, but your outfits should complement one another in formality and color.

Choose what makes you feel comfortable. Modern mother-of-the-bride attire is no longer limited to traditional skirt suits. Consider what makes you feel your best, whether that's a sophisticated jumpsuit, a tailored pantsuit, or a dress with a timeless silhouette.

Avoid certain colours. Steer clear of white, ivory, and champagne, which are reserved for the bride. Some traditions also advise avoiding black and red, though this is less strict today. If in doubt, ask the couple.

Don't forget the shoes. You will be on your feet for a long time, so comfort is key. Break in your shoes before the big day and, if wearing heels, consider bringing a stylish, lower-heeled pair for dancing

The day of the wedding

Be present and enjoy the moment. The wedding day can go by quickly. Stay present and joyful and resist the urge to fuss over minor details.

Arrive ready and on time. Plan to have your hair and makeup done before the bride gets ready. This allows you to be a calm and helpful presence while she gets dressed. Helping her with her gown or veil is a special, traditional moment for a mother and daughter.

Greet guests. As a host, you can assist in greeting and welcoming guests to the ceremony and reception. This is particularly important if the couple has many out-of-town guests.

Keep a clutch of essentials. Pack a small bag with tissues, touch-up makeup, and anything else you might need throughout the day. It's a long, emotional day, and being prepared is a smart move.

Give a special speech (if planned). If you are giving a toast, keep it heartfelt and focused on the couple. Practice beforehand to manage any nerves.

Find moments to connect. During the day, steal a quiet moment with your daughter to tell her how proud you are. A public acknowledgment during a toast or a special mother-daughter dance can also be a touching gesture.